Beemerdon Compilation (Put all your BD jokes here)

[AKjitsu]

A group of American tourists came in. One of the Americans said, in a loud voice, "I hear you Irish think your great drinkers. I bet 5,000 euros that no-one hear can drink 30 pints of Guinness in 30 minutes."
The bar was silent, the American noticed one Irishman leaving, no-one took up the bet.
40 minutes later the Irishman who left returned and said "Hey Yank, is your wee bet still on?"
"Sure" said the American, "30 pints in 30 minutes for a bet of 5,000 euros."
"Grand so" replied the Irishman, "pour the pints and start the clock."
It was very close but the last drop was consumed with 2 seconds to spare.
"Ok yank, pay up." said the Irishman.
"I'm happy to pay, here is your money" said the American.
"But tell me, when I first offered the wager I saw you leave. Where did you go?'
The Irishman replied, "Well sir, 5,000 euros is a lot of money to a man like me, so I went to the pub across the road to see if I could do it."

 

[beemerdons]

Thanks, that was my Uncle Seamus!

 

[Jer]

 

[RossKean]

Pretty similar to this...

https://www.fjrforum.com/forum//index.php/topic/159366-you-know-who-you-are/

 

[Surly]

 

[majicmaker]

Perfect!

 

[RadioHowie]

The dog....not Surly. (I think :rofl: )

 

[beemerdons]

Perfect!

+1, Gunny! JSNS!

 

[cota95]

That was fun...

 

[Top_Speed1]

You even get thought of 'Down Under'; Pappa... you're loved worldwide

 

[Pterodactyl]

15,000 bottles of Jameson stolen from Dublin warehouse in armed burglary

Irish police are investigating the burglary of a Dublin warehouse last month where suspected gang members stole over 2,500 cases of alcohol, reports The Sunday World.

On November 14, armed men entered a liquor warehouse, tied up employees, and loaded cases of Jameson whiskey, Bombay Sapphire gin and Jack Daniels onto two 40-foot trucks before driving off. Each contains six bottles so the thieves reportedly made off with at least 15,480 bottles of Jameson alone.

 

[Top_Speed1]

There's going to be a lot of tippy peeps in Ireland this Holiday. .....Oh wait, forget it. It's always like that there.

Don's innocent btw. I know this cuz he has enough spare pocket change to buy 10 of those warehouses.

 

[yamafitter]

Don's innocent btw. I know this cuz he has enough spare pocket change to buy 10 of those warehouses.

But Don has told us many times that he is so cheap that he farts on rocks to save the grease therefore your theory as to Don's innocence falls flat.

Now if you had said that Don is innocent because no Irishman is smart enough to steal that much booze then I would have no arguement.

 

[beemerdons]

Don's innocent btw. I know this cuz he has enough spare pocket change to buy 10 of those warehouses.

But Don has told us many times that he is so cheap that he farts on rocks to save the grease therefore your theory as to Don's innocence falls flat.

Now if you had said that Don is innocent because no Irishman is smart enough to steal that much booze then I would have no arguement.

Uh, Billy Fitz; eh, ese:

 

[airboss]

The robbery is a month old.

If Don did do it all the evidence has been consumed by now.

 

[Fred W]

Wow. So they sneaked away in two 40 foot semis?

Something tells me nobody was looking very hard.

Perhaps the local constables received a portion of the proceeds?

 

[FJRay]

Don did say something about refilling the swimming pool.

 

[Pterodactyl]

The Stones' Sax player Bobby Keys passed away yesterday. As the story goes, Bobby and Mick Jagger once got into a major tiff because Bobby drank the bulk of a bath tub full of Dom Perignon Champagne. Perhaps Don is planning his own special version of Bobby's feat. By the way, not surprisingly Bobby Keys died of cirrhosis.

 

[russperry]

"Getting a grip on Beemerdons" implies a level of familiarity that is beyond everyone on this forum with the possible exception of 'Zilla and Bust

JSNS