donaldb
Well-known member
A Christmas Story
?'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was pissed.
?He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
?Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
?I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!
?I've busted my *** for damn near a year,
?Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear?
?The old lady ******* cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money--The reindeer all fight.
?Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
?Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better
?Those ******** from the IRS sent me a letter,
?They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny
?Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?
?And the kids these days--they all are the pits
?They want the impossible--Those mean little *****
?I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's--No request for them,
?They want computers and robots...they think - I! 'm IBM!
Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
?I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
?I'll sit on my fat *** and draw unemployment.
?There's no Christmas this year now you know the reason,
?I found me a blonde. I'm going SOUTH for the season
?'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was pissed.
?He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
?Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
?I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!
?I've busted my *** for damn near a year,
?Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear?
?The old lady ******* cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money--The reindeer all fight.
?Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
?Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better
?Those ******** from the IRS sent me a letter,
?They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny
?Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?
?And the kids these days--they all are the pits
?They want the impossible--Those mean little *****
?I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's--No request for them,
?They want computers and robots...they think - I! 'm IBM!
Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
?I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
?I'll sit on my fat *** and draw unemployment.
?There's no Christmas this year now you know the reason,
?I found me a blonde. I'm going SOUTH for the season
