how to open a beer.

[odot]

Ok, kids...been stuck in portland oregon for the past three hours. Brought a 12 pack of heinies with me to the room. NO opener. Been using the tissue paper dispenser to open my bottles.....with little luck. The rock keeps breaking....or stone, or whatever it is. I am demolishing my room opening up beer bottles. Other then the obvious.....how does one open up a beer with out a lighter, an opener, a stone surface designed for tissue paper dispensing and ramming the base of a palm into a beer cap? My hand hurts. I still have beer left....enlighten me, drunks...errrr....kids.

 

[odot]

...and no, skooterg....I am not using the hotel porcelein goddess to open my beer!

 

[radman]

Toilet tank parts, drawer pulls, window latch components, keys, nail file, teeth. In that order. Amateurs............

 

[JimLor]

belt buckle fit? USMC buckle works great, think it was made specifically to open beer bottles!

 

[odot]

This thread can might as well get locked. Holiday inn is now a communist hotel. You can't get a damn thing done in here unless you are laying eggs. Every stool, desk, chair, table is mitered. No edges. The sink is the same....all you will do is break off stone. The only nook and cranny I could find was the nose wipe dispenser. Almost perfect except everytime you use it....you chip away the stone. Reminds me of a rush song....nevermind. I was hoping you military folk would have some foolproof stuff so that I wouldn't have to carry around an opener of some sort.

 

[yanktar]

Hammer claw, screwdriver, tire iron, any wrench off your bike. Maybe ask the hotel for a bottle opener????

Heineken doesn't have twist-offs?

 

[Scab]

Open the door. Use the striker plate hole. If that don't work, set the edge of the bottle top on the actual latch, then slap downward with palm while gently holding downward pressure with the hand holding the bottle.

If that don't work, go back to store. Buy cans.

What kind of drinker are you, anyway? Any self-respecting alcaholic would have chewed through the bottle by now.

 

[odot]

Ok, kids...welcome to post 9/11 activity on the airport. No tools. Unless they escort you in. All my tools are on the plane (da plane...da plane). As for the plate on the door...there is a "do not disturb" sign on the room next door.....means I gotsta keep mum in here now, ya hear? Getting drunk on free beer in the early hours of the morn is few and far between. No help thus far....lock this thread oh, gods of admindom.....oh, lock this thread(and spread the water, too.).

 

[C&C]

A house key works fine. Slowly work under the lip of the cap and pry it off.

 

[twowheelnut]

First of all, your post was at 6 am and your just having your first beer?! Rookie!

Secondly, go to the front desk and ask for a bottle opener. Better yet, kick that ho you picked up at the sleezy bar last night outta bed and make her do it.

 

[Ignacio]

Here's a great suggestion for how to open 11 of the 12. Not sure what you do on the 12th, but figure you've either had enough by that point or will have stocked your FJR toolbag appropriately.

Maxim's Method for Opening Beer Bottles With Another Beer Bottle

 

[twowheelnut]

50/50 chance of the upside down bottle opening. Waste of good beer!

 

[Bounce]

reach around to your belt pouch for this.

other than that, go back to the store where you bought the beer and buy a church key.

 

[red2kcbr]

Grasp beer bottle firmly in one hand, placing index finger near the top, under the cap.

Using a Bic lighter or similar instrument, and your index finger as a pivot point, place the lighter under the cap and apply pressure to the cap, pivoting on your finger as a fulcrum.

Repeat as needed.

 

[Bananas]

TWN,

The bottle on bottle method works everytime, once you master it. Been using this technique for years. The 12th bottle is opened using the method that John Belushi used in the movie "1942" (remember that?).

Bananas!

 

[odot]

Been using the lighter technique for years. But, can't bring a lighter onto a plane, ya know. Ignacio....that's the ticket. So maxim is good for something other then bathroom reading material.

 

[boogahboogah]

In emergency situations, I've used keys to open bottles, for, geez, over 35 years now...

Insert key (tooth edge) under part of bottletop, pry slightly, move key 1/10 turn, repeat as necessary.

Always worked for me...

 

[daytripper]

You could have bought cans.

 

[odot]

I could have....but then I would have spent money. Also, it's kind of hard to buy beer when it's four in the morning in commie land. I like beer. But, I like free beer better. Hassle or not.