donaldb
Well-known member
The Navy found they had too many officers and decided
> to offer an
> early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who
> volunteered for
> retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured
> in a straight line between
> any two points in his body. The officer got to choose
> what those two points
> would be.
>
> The first officer who accepted asked that he be
> measured from the top
> of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured
> at six feet and walked
> out with a bonus of $72,000.
>
> The second officer who accepted was a little smarter
> and asked to be
> measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to
> his toes. He walked
> out with $96,000.
>
> The third one was a noncommissioned officer, a
> grizzly old Chief who,
> when asked where he would like to be measured
> replied, "From the tip of my
> weenie to my testicles." It was suggested by the
> pension man that he might
> want to reconsider, explaining about the nice big
> checks the previous two
> officers had received. But the old Chief insisted and
> they decided to go along
> with him providing the measurement was taken by a
> medical officer.
>
> The medical officer arrived and instructed the Chief
> to "drop 'em,"
> which he did. The medical officer placed the tape
> measure on the tip
> of the Chief's weenie and began to work back. Dear
> Lord!" he suddenly
> exclaimed, "Where are your testicles?"
>
>
> The old Chief calmly replied, "Vietnam."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
> to offer an
> early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who
> volunteered for
> retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured
> in a straight line between
> any two points in his body. The officer got to choose
> what those two points
> would be.
>
> The first officer who accepted asked that he be
> measured from the top
> of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured
> at six feet and walked
> out with a bonus of $72,000.
>
> The second officer who accepted was a little smarter
> and asked to be
> measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to
> his toes. He walked
> out with $96,000.
>
> The third one was a noncommissioned officer, a
> grizzly old Chief who,
> when asked where he would like to be measured
> replied, "From the tip of my
> weenie to my testicles." It was suggested by the
> pension man that he might
> want to reconsider, explaining about the nice big
> checks the previous two
> officers had received. But the old Chief insisted and
> they decided to go along
> with him providing the measurement was taken by a
> medical officer.
>
> The medical officer arrived and instructed the Chief
> to "drop 'em,"
> which he did. The medical officer placed the tape
> measure on the tip
> of the Chief's weenie and began to work back. Dear
> Lord!" he suddenly
> exclaimed, "Where are your testicles?"
>
>
> The old Chief calmly replied, "Vietnam."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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