beemerdons
Certifiable Old Fart
Remembering Your parents
> Most of our generation was
> HOME SCHOOLED in many ways.
> 1. My mother taught me
> TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
> "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.
> I just finished cleaning."
>
> 2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
> "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
>
> 3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
> "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock
> you into the middle of next week!"
>
> 4. My father taught me LOGIC.
> " Because I said so, that's why."
>
> 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
> "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,
> you're not going to the store with me."
>
> 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
> "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case
> you're in an accident."
>
> 7. My father taught me IRONY.
> "Keep crying,
> and I'll give you something to cry about."
>
> 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
> "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
>
> 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
> "Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
>
> 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
> "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
>
> 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
> "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
>
> 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
> "If I told you once, I've told you a million times.
> Don't exaggerate!"
>
> 13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
> "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..."
>
> 14. My mother taught me about
> BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
> "Stop acting like your father!"
>
> 15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
> "There are millions of less fortunate children in
> this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
>
> 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
> "Just wait until we get home."
>
> 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
> "You are going to get it from your father
> when you get home!"
>
> 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
> "If you don't stop crossing your eyes,
> they are going to get stuck that way."
>
> 19. My mother taught me ESP.
> "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know
> when you are cold?"
>
> 20. My father taught me HUMOR.
> "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes,
> don't come running to me."
>
> 21. My mother taught me
> HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
> "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
>
> 22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
> "You're just like your father."
>
> 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
> "Shut that door behind you.
> Do you think you were born in a barn?"
>
> 24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
> "When you get to be my age, you'll understand.
>
> 25. My father taught me about JUSTICE .
> "One day you'll have kids,
> and I hope they turn out just like you !"
>
> *******************************
>
>
> Quote of the day:
>
>
> "Faith is not about everything turning out ok.
> It's about being ok, no matter how things turn out."
>
> This was only sent to the over 50 crowd because the younger ones would not believe we truly were told these "EXACT" words by our parents
> Most of our generation was
> HOME SCHOOLED in many ways.
> 1. My mother taught me
> TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
> "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.
> I just finished cleaning."
>
> 2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
> "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
>
> 3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
> "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock
> you into the middle of next week!"
>
> 4. My father taught me LOGIC.
> " Because I said so, that's why."
>
> 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
> "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,
> you're not going to the store with me."
>
> 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
> "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case
> you're in an accident."
>
> 7. My father taught me IRONY.
> "Keep crying,
> and I'll give you something to cry about."
>
> 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
> "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
>
> 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
> "Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
>
> 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
> "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
>
> 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
> "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
>
> 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
> "If I told you once, I've told you a million times.
> Don't exaggerate!"
>
> 13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
> "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..."
>
> 14. My mother taught me about
> BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
> "Stop acting like your father!"
>
> 15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
> "There are millions of less fortunate children in
> this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
>
> 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
> "Just wait until we get home."
>
> 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
> "You are going to get it from your father
> when you get home!"
>
> 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
> "If you don't stop crossing your eyes,
> they are going to get stuck that way."
>
> 19. My mother taught me ESP.
> "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know
> when you are cold?"
>
> 20. My father taught me HUMOR.
> "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes,
> don't come running to me."
>
> 21. My mother taught me
> HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
> "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
>
> 22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
> "You're just like your father."
>
> 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
> "Shut that door behind you.
> Do you think you were born in a barn?"
>
> 24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
> "When you get to be my age, you'll understand.
>
> 25. My father taught me about JUSTICE .
> "One day you'll have kids,
> and I hope they turn out just like you !"
>
> *******************************
>
>
> Quote of the day:
>
>
> "Faith is not about everything turning out ok.
> It's about being ok, no matter how things turn out."
>
> This was only sent to the over 50 crowd because the younger ones would not believe we truly were told these "EXACT" words by our parents
