Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.
He who hesitates is probably right.
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
A penny saved is a government oversight.
Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs'.
Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are ' XL.'
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. First you forget names, and then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper. It's worse when you forget to pull it down.
He who hesitates is probably right.
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
A penny saved is a government oversight.
Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs'.
Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are ' XL.'
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. First you forget names, and then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper. It's worse when you forget to pull it down.
