Don't Ask, Don't Tell

I know I'm better off not discussing bike washing on this forum. But I've run into a problem I don't have a solution (pun) for.

So, the tree at the end of the driveway is a favorite among the birds. One night this week I left the bike out under this tree and came out to a few surprises on the right saddlebag. Having dealt with these birds, and what they eat, for years, I decided this could wait for the weekend.

Well, this is no ordinary bird spooge. I've tried soap and water, Goo-gone, Honda Spray Cleaner, WD-40, lighter fluid, Isopropyl Alcohol, and kerosene (this last one was a desperation move that helped me succed in scratching the paint). Nothing is taking this stuff off. It looks almost like dried varnish or etched glass. (Birds don't normally produce hydrofluoric acid, do they?)

Any recommendations for alternative Snake Oils?

Ooooh, poop problems. Not good. You have one shot and that is to get the buffing wheel out. That, er, shit has etched the clear coat, so no solution with depoop your paint.

You just may be screwed. Birds poo and pee in the same wad of goo so there is going to be acid. One last thing to try (in the shade) is some scrubbing bubbles. Let 'em sit a bit and see if it helps. If not, refer to post above.

I've had very good luck with 5 Star Wax and Grease Remover It worked great with removing adhesives, decals, road tar, and other stuff that concentrated simple green couldn't get....without screwing with the paint at all. It does remove any wax though.

I got at my local professional paint (like the place that will mix automotive paint for 'ya) shop.

twowheelnut said:

Ooooh, poop problems. Not good. You have one shot and that is to get the buffing wheel out. That, er, shit has etched the clear coat, so no solution with depoop your paint.

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Shit! (pun) It really does look like it's etched. Grrrr.

I've cleaned a lot of bird crap off cars and bikes. Never seen something like this. Guess I've been lucky.

Try a pinch of rubbing compound....just be really careful....

Aw...just leave it...you can tell your grandkids about it.

Ari Rankum said:

Shit! (pun) It really does look like it's etched. Grrrr.

Click to expand...

Wet sand the area smooth with 2000 grit paper and then buff it out in 3 steps.

Compound

Polish

Wax

If your not up to that task, have a professional detailer (like myself) remove it for you.

It will take less then 10 minutes for a detailer to fix that.

Ari,

You need to buy some "Finesse-it II" rubbing compound by 3M. You'll probably have to go to an autobody paint and supply store.

This stuff is an abrasion less compound and will not scratch. What it does is to gently dissolve the clear coat a little at a time as you rub it in. Stop rubbing when the spot is gone.

The most popular use for this stuff is for buffing out paint jobs after wet sanding with 2000 grit. Warning! It is a little pricey, how ever one bottle should last you through about 5000 bird doo doo's.

Bananas!

Before you do any sanding or compounds, use plexis.

Agree with Nut…Cut and Polish it out or before that maybe try some eucalyptus oil…this stuff can do just about anything!

Best of luck

Quote: 2000 grit wetsand, and buff it out..

that is the right answer...

only proper way to heal etching...

Whoa, slam on the brakes just a minute. While all this sounds all well and good, a few points should be noted. If it is acid, it will need to be nuetralized. Acid will continue to travel through the paint to the substrate then subsequently return to the top. Failure to do this is why many repainted surfaces that were damaged by acid rain ultimately fail. Secondly, sanding, buffing, polishing, etc, all REMOVE some of your paint or clearcoat. This is not an endeavor to be entered into lightly. You have maybe 3 -5 mils of clearcoat. A cut-through is EASY if you are not skilled and practiced at the art. Thirdly, any sanding or buffing will shorten the life of your paint. Think of your clearcoat as sunscreen. The less you have, the less time it will take UV rays to kill it.

If you are not accustomed to ultra-fine sanding/buffing, your side case is not the place to learn. Take it by a reputable collision repair facility and get an expert opinion. If it is safe to sand and buff, let 'em do it. If the etching is any depth at all, it may require spot repair and reclearing of the panel. This, however, will then reveal just how crappy the rest of the paint on your feej is in regards to gloss and depth of gloss appearance. (This ain't the best stuff I have ever seen sprayed on a moving vehicle. Reminds me of the Sherwin/Williams crap. I don't know who made this paint, though.)

To get a better idea of the real damage, get a surface microscope from Radio Shack. Cheap. That will give you 30x magnification of the surface.

Scab said:

To get a better idea of the real damage, get a surface microscope from Radio Shack. Cheap. That will give you 30x magnification of the surface.

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Thanks for the tip. I've been thinking I'd really like to see the surface up close. A magnifying glass is not good enough, a bench microscope, besides being unwieldy, would be too much.

odot is selling his special Milwaukee's Best mixture as the latest, greatest spooge remover. just might work.

Ari Rankum said:

I know I'm better off not discussing bike washing on this forum. But I've run into a problem I don't have a solution (pun) for.
So, the tree at the end of the driveway is a favorite among the birds. One night this week I left the bike out under this tree and came out to a few surprises on the right saddlebag. Having dealt with these birds, and what they eat, for years, I decided this could wait for the weekend.

Well, this is no ordinary bird spooge. I've tried soap and water, Goo-gone, Honda Spray Cleaner, WD-40, lighter fluid, Isopropyl Alcohol, and kerosene (this last one was a desperation move that helped me succed in scratching the paint). Nothing is taking this stuff off. It looks almost like dried varnish or etched glass. (Birds don't normally produce hydrofluoric acid, do they?)

Any recommendations for alternative Snake Oils?

Click to expand...

At this point you'll have to paint the bike White, with black flakes!

fjrchik said:

odot is selling his special Milwaukee's Best mixture as the latest, greatest spooge remover. just might work.

Click to expand...

odot, milwaukee's best, and spooge all in the same post?

[shudddddder...]

What if you were to lay the bike over on it's right side and tear the case up just enough for insurance to replace it? :yahoo:

Just wanted to post a cheap fix I ran across.

I was at Wally World today (yes, I do know that it is hell on Earth...yes I do know I'm sending US jobs to China) and came across two products that claim to fix minor scratches (I made some scratches in my side bag finish trying to remove the etching) and slight "hazing". Could they mean etching and oxidation, I wonder?

The first product, at a buck-eighty-five, was Kit "Scratch Out". The second was eight bucks and change from Nu Finish. I decided to try the el cheapo product first. Sonofabitch! It worked. Etching gone, small scratches gone.

For really tiny scratches or swirls in your clear coat, or etching from bird poop, I'd have to recommend Kit's "Scratch Out". Who knew?