Dirt-biking in the desert

[SkooterG]

I went dirt-biking for the first time in my life today. Buddy of mine took me out to the Boulders recreation area northwest of Phoenix today. I got to ride his KTM 300EXC two-stroke. Did about 15+ miles of sand washes, single track. Seemed like 500. Lots of soft stuff. Lots of rough stuff. Lots of whoop-de-doos. Oh, and hills. LOTS of hills. God.... so many ******* hills.

Great weather, great scenery. I had a great time..........

[SIZE=24pt]AND I GOT MY ******* *** KICKED.[/SIZE]

Right now I feel like a 90 year old man. I don't think there's a part of my body that doesn't hurt. I had no idea riding a little feather-weight dirt bike was such a freaking killer. Fuke me.

Damn those hills. Caused me all kinds of problems. Of course that single track with Cholla cactus brushing by inches away wasn't so easy either. But I guess the worst was the loose stuff with golf ball to softball size rocks. Especially when going up those ******* hills.

I'm not even sure how many times I smacked the ground today. Four? Five? I do remember the one where I fell 'down' the steep slope to my right. Seemed to add a good 4' to the fall for extra measure and my entertainment value. Of course there were the times that I got stopped halfway up the hill, or worse, just within reach of the top. Then there was the ******* hill where after stopping just off the track, and trying to get going again I did a hell of a wheelie. I think I **** my pants 3 times in about 1.6 seconds. At least on those occasions when I got to see the desert floor from mere millimeters away I never landed on any cactus. Ouch. That coulda hurt.

Wish I had remembered to bring my camera. The scenery on top of those ******* hills was breathtaking.

At the end of the ride, that ******* friend of mine, a 57 year old gramps who has been riding dirt for 25 years then tells me how easy today's ride was compared to what he usually does.

**** him.

And the dirtbike he rode in on.

I am going to bed.

Think I'll be cursing my 'friend' in the morning when I wake up and re-live the ride all over again while trying to get out of bed.

I can't wait for the next time.

I think.

 

[Bustanut joker]

Ah qitcher Whinin' ya big *****! Gawd I was still doin' hare scrambles at yer age..

[SIZE=8pt]an bitching far more the next day[/SIZE]

Yeah I know ya had fun.. Hard not to isn't it?

Grab that fat *** step daddy an whip his *** one time out there for me would ya?

:jester:

 

[madmike2]

Does this mean you will be taking a "snicker pause" each time you sell a dirt bike to an unsuspecting newbie?

NOW you know why I like hard-packed dirt roads and do not care to ride single-tack anything.

Good for you, youngster. Imagine all the muscles and joints you'll find tomorrow......

....that you didn't know existed! And the colors....oh yeah, the colors your bruises will turn! :clapping:

 

[wheatonFJR]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

You are so screwed. :clapping:

Tomorrow morning will come and spank you. Your body will let you know what you did to it. And it won't be happy. :assassin:



Glad you had a great time. You goin' across Mexico with Beemerdons on one of those things?

Now I know I better stay the fook off those things...as I've never ridden one.

 

[dcarver]

You are such a street *****.

Try riding 1,000 miles a day *in the dirt*, eh butt-boy? :****: :rofl:

Ahh, I can't be that mean to little Skooter, I think it's kind of cool he went out rode dirt, now me thinks he has a brand new appreciation and it will make him a better street ***** rider too!

 

[Bustanut joker]

You are such a street *****. Try riding 1,000 miles a day *in the dirt*, eh butt-boy? :****: :rofl:

Ahh, I can't be that mean to little Skooter, I think it's kind of cool he went out rode dirt, now me thinks he has a brand new appreciation and it will make him a better street ***** rider too!

Ya mean just possibly that "Trailer Queen" Scoot of his might get a scratch? :blink: He might actually ride somewhat more aggressive? Oh The Horrors!

:jester:

 

[James Burleigh]

Good on ya. I want to do the same thing. I've never been on a dirt bike (haven't been on a street bike that much either).

Just as I was riding home tonight it occured to me that I have a lot of miles of experience commuting, but I have very little experience of what it feels like (the end of the world) to have my rear tire slip out. And I thought of ol' Don ("F**k you :****: ) Carver and how he slides his FJR on that dirt trail he calls a road leading up to his house, and I thought, "Man, he may be the biggest a**hole on the forum, and women may weep and small children throw stones at him when he rides by, and even his dog may want to bite him and defecate on his pillow, but the dude's got some mad motorcycle skills." :assassin:

So although I hear dirt riding is fun an' all, my interest is in getting more and different experience to improve my skills and survivability on the street. So some day I'd like to take a weekend course and learn the fundamentals.

 

[ShinyPartsUp]

You are such a street *****. Try riding 1,000 miles a day *in the dirt*, eh butt-boy? :****: :rofl:

Ahh, I can't be that mean to little Skooter, I think it's kind of cool he went out rode dirt, now me thinks he has a brand new appreciation and it will make him a better street ***** rider too!

Ya mean just possibly that "Trailer Queen" Scoot of his might get a scratch? :blink: He might actually ride somewhat more aggressive? Oh The Horrors!

:jester:

Or maybe next time he goes on the playa he won't fook up as bad...

Good on ya Skooter! Wait till your kidneys wake you up in the middle of the night. Something about dirt riding hurts the hell out of my kidneys and lower back. I thought I was going to die after 50 miles... We gonna have to build up to 200 miles for Mexico buddy -- yer coming aren't ya?

 

[CAJW]

I went dirt-biking for the first time in my life today. Buddy of mine took me out to the Boulders recreation area northwest of Phoenix today. I got to ride his KTM 300EXC two-stroke. Did about 15+ miles of sand washes, single track. Seemed like 500. Lots of soft stuff. Lots of rough stuff. Lots of whoop-de-doos. Oh, and hills. LOTS of hills. God.... so many ******* hills.
Great weather, great scenery. I had a great time..........

[SIZE=24pt]AND I GOT MY ******* *** KICKED.[/SIZE]

Wish I had remembered to bring my camera. The scenery on top of those ******* hills was breathtaking.

I think.

Here Greg, you can borrow one of mine. Yeah, Cholla's SUCK!

 

[beemerdons]

Well, sounds like you had a great day to me SkootyG. You picked a classic area to ride in with the Boulders, it is a real toughy!

October of 1995, I took my brand new 1996 BMW R1100GS out to the Boulders and promptly beat the **** out of it and myself. Was so stupid and unprepared I even left the new BMW saddlebags on it when I hit the desert tracks; what a dumb ***!

You are dead right about that long stretch of "baby's heads" rocks, seems like it goes on forever and beats the crap out of your arms. At least you were on a perfect machine; those KTM 300 EXC two-strokes are absolutely "La Bamba" for our Sonoran desert. I'm with madmike2, Forest Service roads are way easier; if they're not packed with slippery than **** mud, ha!

 

[MojaveFJR]

Ah, another pavement princess gets indoc'ed to the world of dirt. Can just hear the conversation now about how riding in the dirt ain't nothing and how those dirt bikes are feather light with wimpy 35 hp motors. Yeah buddy....

Betcha he calls in today, going to be one hurtin puppy after that ride.

Amazing that someone put you on a two stroke and took you through that type of terrain. He must really "like" you. :blink:

Now, try that on a 550 lb 110 hp pig of a BMW R 1200 GS.

 

[Thug]

That's as funny as **** G!

 

[Silver Penguin]

Good on ya. I want to do the same thing. I've never been on a dirt bike (haven't been on a street bike that much either).
Just as I was riding home tonight it occured to me that I have a lot of miles of experience commuting, but I have very little experience of what it feels like (the end of the world) to have my rear tire slip out. And I thought of ol' Don ("F**k you :****: ) Carver and how he slides his FJR on that dirt trail he calls a road leading up to his house, and I thought, "Man, he may be the biggest a**hole on the forum, and women may weep and small children throw stones at him when he rides by, and even his dog may want to bite him and defecate on his pillow, but the dude's got some mad motorcycle skills." :assassin:

So although I hear dirt riding is fun an' all, my interest is in getting more and different experience to improve my skills and survivability on the street. So some day I'd like to take a weekend course and learn the fundamentals.

LOL! Loved the write up. My first dirt ride was all of about ten yards long before I decided that I didn't like it. The bike slips and slides like crazy, giving you the feeling that you're just about to fall off (and trash the tupperware and have a 700lb beast lying on top of you, and have to admit it on the forum and.....) but it doesn't work that way, The bike slithers around a bit, then keeps going. If you do fall off, the bike doesn't mind, You just pick it and get on with it. And do it again. And pick it up again.

In a perverse kind of way, it really is fun.

JB - Check out the MSF dirt class. Bike and all gear included. Pretty fun day out, but don't plan on doing anything that involves getting out of bed the next day.

We're headed for the desert on Friday. My new CRF230L needs to get dirty. It's only been on the street so far, for the 25 or so miles it has on the clock.

 

[FJRBluesman]

Glad you're branching out SkooterG. Dirt biking is a whole 'nother animal. Gives you quite the workout, which you need.

A few miles seems like many miles, as you experienced.

Now get in shape and get back out there. :yahoo:

Oh yeah, no pix.... Did it really happen... Just sayin'... :lol:

 

[Leskid]

when riding dirt, if you aint wiping out, you aint having enough fun

as your skill level increases, so does the severity of your wipeouts but the same rule applies.

 

[Patriot]

ah, the memories...course here in the east / deep south...it was woods, pipelines, mud, and lotsa hard packed orange/red clay. It's gratifying when the dirt bike "racer" skills kick in on the FJR (fingers, toe, and brain are ABS on my '04) when I can sense where it's going and what the proper input is to get it back on track.

I freak my non dirt biker riders out a bit when we visit a bud who lives out in the country with a freshly graveled long road to his house. Everyone is paddling and plowing along and I think "my, I wonder how fast the bike will skim the front tire over the ball bearing road and how far can I kick the bike sideways with the throttle before a pucker factor exists."

They think I'm crazy and will go down any minute in a blast of dust. I don't push it after the first few minutes, but do eye up the compost pile picturing the Feej doing a jump off the ground. <won't ever happen>

 

[beemerdons]

Geez Marie, Patriot Mike: Don't give SkooterG any more wierd ideas than the ones he already has. As MadMike2 always says, Skooty has more damn "air time" on his FJR, "The Dirty Old Whore", than Michael Jordan had playing for the Chicago Bulls!

 

[Auburn]

Glad you're branching out SkooterG. Dirt biking is a whole 'nother animal. Gives you quite the workout, which you need.
A few miles seems like many miles, as you experienced.

Now get in shape and get back out there. :yahoo:

Oh yeah, no pix.... Did it really happen... Just sayin'... :lol:

Other than the sheer fun of off road riding, there is one huge benefit - NO SPEEDING TICKETS!

Keep it up skooter, it is a lot of fun.

 

[scubatech]

I did the same thing my first time in Moab about 15 years ago. I bought that 390 Husky from my friend to learn on that summer. I thought I could ride after all the years on the street. What a humbling day! I have been through 7 or 8 dirt bikes since and learned a lot of skills. I still can't keep up with my friends that learned as kids, which pisses me off,but keep trying and having fun.