Expanding Your Vocabulary
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Niehart
Pie Smuggler
LOL
JamesW
JamesW
Those little buggers just keep reloading.
ionbeam
2 FUN
Some years ago, on a Saturday morning Pillion and I were riding on a very crowded road near a beach. All of a sudden Pillion started violently jumping around and then suddenly I saw her blouse flash past my peripheral vision. It's not like her to strip down on a crowded road
so I pulled over to see whazzup. Turns out that a Giant European Hornet had gone down her top and was walking along like a sewing machine stitching huge holes in her. These things look like a yellow jacket that is 1 1/2" long.
I've had stingie thingies get stuck between my helmet liner and my cheek, forehead, ear and eye socket. I've had them blow down into my jacket. I had one apparently hit my body and fall down between my legs and the seat, it was angry and let me know it when it came to. It's a struggle looking for a place to pull over while getting the bejeezus stung out of ya. It's amazing how they can miraculously and improbably zip through impossibly small spaces and lodge in the most painful places.
I'm sure most people that ride any significant miles have insect and wild life impact on body stories. I've hit birds with my body hard enough to leave an outline bruise even through a heavy, padded leather coat. I've seen pictures of people skewered by woodpecker beaks.
I've had stingie thingies get stuck between my helmet liner and my cheek, forehead, ear and eye socket. I've had them blow down into my jacket. I had one apparently hit my body and fall down between my legs and the seat, it was angry and let me know it when it came to. It's a struggle looking for a place to pull over while getting the bejeezus stung out of ya. It's amazing how they can miraculously and improbably zip through impossibly small spaces and lodge in the most painful places.
I'm sure most people that ride any significant miles have insect and wild life impact on body stories. I've hit birds with my body hard enough to leave an outline bruise even through a heavy, padded leather coat. I've seen pictures of people skewered by woodpecker beaks.
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gixxerjasen
Well-known member
I've been fortunate to only have two encounters with bees on the bike. First, don't know how he got there but he was crawling on the inside of my face shield, wings touching my eyelashes. Damn near wrecked the bike getting pulled over. I carefully took off the helmet and threw it into the field in one fluid motion. Then I gave him about 15 minutes before retrieving and checking it so I could continue on. Boss was understanding of why I was late to work.
Couple of years ago I had just left work downtown and they were doing a huge construction project. They must have ripped open a bee hive somewhere because as I pulled up to a light I found myself pulling into an angry swarm. Light changed almost immediately thankfully but I got to the next one and they were still around me. Checked for all clear and blew that red light and the next one and finally left the swarm behind as I got on the highway. Thought I was all clear except for the hitchhiker on my leg. I shifted my weight around and pinched him between my leg and the tank and he let me have it through my jeans (yea yea I know, I do better now) scaring the bejezus out of me.
Couple of years ago I had just left work downtown and they were doing a huge construction project. They must have ripped open a bee hive somewhere because as I pulled up to a light I found myself pulling into an angry swarm. Light changed almost immediately thankfully but I got to the next one and they were still around me. Checked for all clear and blew that red light and the next one and finally left the swarm behind as I got on the highway. Thought I was all clear except for the hitchhiker on my leg. I shifted my weight around and pinched him between my leg and the tank and he let me have it through my jeans (yea yea I know, I do better now) scaring the bejezus out of me.
Warpdrv
Well-known member
Gotta learn how to be a BEE CHARMER...
My Good friend has a honey bee farm, asked if I wanted too join in the harvest. Asked if I wanted the hood and all the Gear, I said no, let's see what happens. Spent an hour gathering honey, not a single sting.
Called me the BEE CHARMER ever since.
All about the vibes you give off.
Ive always let them crawl on me all my life, my woman loses her mind when I do that.
My Good friend has a honey bee farm, asked if I wanted too join in the harvest. Asked if I wanted the hood and all the Gear, I said no, let's see what happens. Spent an hour gathering honey, not a single sting.
Called me the BEE CHARMER ever since.
All about the vibes you give off.
Ive always let them crawl on me all my life, my woman loses her mind when I do that.
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Fine ride one day, not far from the house. Felt the little booger hit me right below the chin bar then down the collar he goes. Luckily I was at a crossroads intersection with a little gas station there. I whip in behind a big dump truck- saw the fellas sitting on the floorboards taking a break but didn't care. Did the grab-the-brakes, hit-the-killswitch, kickstand-down stop, jumped off and dropped my drawers right then and there as the biting/stinging f'er was having himself a good ol' time right at the top of my buttcrack. I think it was right about the time I squashed it that one of the guys taking a break came around to see what the hell was going on. So there I am, in all my glory, pants around my ankles with a "gotcha ya little bassturd" grimace and all I could do was look at the guy and say, "bee."
We had us a good laugh when I finally got re-dressed.
We had us a good laugh when I finally got re-dressed.
Guess you were lucky this didn't happen in front of the YMCA...
I had some kind of little biting beetle get into my pants. He decided to chow on the old nutsack. At roadside pants and underwear down, I spotted, then dispatched, the little bugger. Good thing I was in the remote Palouse country of Washington at the time so I don't believe there were witnesses. I could tell you bee/wasps stories for awhile (I now carry antihistamines at all times). The worst though was in the Blue Ridge Country. I laid my jacket on the ground and soon discovered what chiggers are. That ointment the pharmacy lady sold me was sure pungent but did the trick.
Pterodactyl
Well-known member
Group of riders pulling out of a cafe. The lead rider is doing 30-35 MPH or so when he suddenly flops backward on his bike as if he had been shot. He was flat on his back with both hands extended to his side, yet somehow the bike stayed upright and decelerated. The rider recovered after 5 seconds or so and was able to pull over and stop. Riding partners rush to his side. He is groggy and has blood coming from a wound between his eyes. He was wearing a modular helmet wuth the chin bar raised. One fellow rider gets his leatherman pliers out and carefully looks at the wound. He then uses the pliers to pull what turnedout to be a moderately large bird beak out of the rider's forehead.
Man, you ain't kidding!! I think the worst was my one and only ride into Loosiana last yr. Stoplight. Whammo!! something got me in the back. Was able to reach and crunch him. About a mile later wham! wham! Pulled off into a parking lot in metropolis Slidell and started peeling off clothes. 2 More. The drunk scooter guy from the convenience store next door staggered over to have a chat. What a lovely day!Guess you were lucky this didn't happen in front of the YMCA...
SacramentoMike
Not Safe For Work
All I can think about is how the hell her blouse got in your line of sight. She was behind you, right? :lol:
Sounds good. Guess I'll let my wife do that too.
As for me, talking about bees, I let my sig line do the talking.
ionbeam
2 FUN
This is what is meant by "whipping your clothes off" -- while standing on the pegs of a moving motorcycle. Having holes the size of a very large hypodermic needle being made across your stomach is motivational. It was disruptive enough to the traffic around us that I could dive for a driveway and get off the road.All I can think about is how the hell her blouse got in your line of sight. She was behind you, right?
