Friday's Sexist Joke

[user 6393]

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.

9. A better model is always just around the corner.

8. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.

7. It is always necessary to have a backup.

6. They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.

5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.

4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

3. The lights are on but nobody's home.

2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.

1. Size does matter

 

[Pjturbo]

I see you've had experience.

Phil

 

[El Toro Joe]

quick, quick, what is it???

 

[user 6393]

I see you've had experience.
Phil

Traded in the pre-Pentium model as he had a lot of hardware/software issues, but damned if I can find the 'right' buttons on the new model.

 

[madmike2]

You forgot a couple:

Controlled by "bytes" they only answer Yes or No.

At the first sign of overload they lock up.

:yahoo:

[SIZE=8pt]Jist tryin tuh hep....[/SIZE]

 

[uctofeej]

That's funn... hey, wait a minute!

 

[Pjturbo]

Traded in the pre-Pentium model as he had a lot of hardware/software issues, but damned if I can find the 'right' buttons on the new model.

There are only two!!

Phil

 

[user 6393]

Traded in the pre-Pentium model as he had a lot of hardware/software issues, but damned if I can find the 'right' buttons on the new model.

There are only two!!

Phil

Well, I have found 2.

a. I ask/beg to go to motorcycle shops.

b. I point out women with large breasts for his viewing pleasure.

Somehow tho, he never does "whatever I say", so I assume I am missing something...hmmm

 

[madmike2]

Traded in the pre-Pentium model as he had a lot of hardware/software issues, but damned if I can find the 'right' buttons on the new model.

There are only two!!

Phil

Well, I have found 2.

a. I ask/beg to go to motorcycle shops.

b. I point out women with large breasts for his viewing pleasure.

Somehow tho, he never does "whatever I say", so I assume I am missing something...hmmm

Barb, there are only 2 buttons: On and Off!

Any other design problems must be addressed by the original manufacturer. Any unauthorized software to modify base programming will probably be rejected by the "C" drive or recognized as a virus and dealt with by that program.

Er....that is...selective hearing and elective response.

 

[El Gordo]

You also have to consider the model she has to work with.

 

[user 6393]

Barb, there are only 2 buttons: On and Off!
Any other design problems must be addressed by the original manufacturer. Any unauthorized software to modify base programming will probably be rejected by the "C" drive or recognized as a virus and dealt with by that program.

Er....that is...selective hearing and elective response.

After all the advances in technology there is still just 'on' and 'off'? Yeegads I say!

Never had much use for the 'off' button myself, but damnit, he's on his own with chiks and tits then.

Guess it's back to basics. Pizza and beer...

 

[cota95]

Traded in the pre-Pentium model as he had a lot of hardware/software issues, but damned if I can find the 'right' buttons on the new model.

There are only two!!

Phil

Well, I have found 2.

a. I ask/beg to go to motorcycle shops.

b. I point out women with large breasts for his viewing pleasure.

Somehow tho, he never does "whatever I say", so I assume I am missing something...hmmm

You seem to be perfect in my opinion

 

[Pjturbo]

Getting him to do,"Whatever I say" must be prefaced by showing up naked with a cold six pack.

The reality is that since you ride your already at the front of the line with this bunch.

Phil

 

[madmike2]

After all the advances in technology there is still just 'on' and 'off'? Yeegads I say!
Guess it's back to basics. Pizza and beer...

You see.......its still working for us! :yahoo:

May I suggest some reading: "The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands" by Laura Schlessinger. Great info, tips and truth. [SIZE=8pt](Ssssshhhhh, you didn't hear it from me.)[/SIZE]

Were you looking for someone who is deep, sensitive, and cultured, whose personality is textured and multi-faceted? Someone who is compassionate and understanding? May I suggest a close girfriend....

A couple of quotes from "El Gordo" (Phil):

You also have to consider the model she has to work with.

Uhm....her choice. :blink:

The reality is that since you ride your already at the front of the line with this bunch

Amen!

 

[user 6393]

Were you looking for someone who is deep, sensitive, and cultured, whose personality is textured and multi-faceted? Someone who is compassionate and understanding? May I suggest a close girfriend....

Actually, I have a golden retriever. I got the bases covered there. Thanks for the tip tho...

No, when it comes to the 'push right buttons for desired affect' thing, I was thinking more along the lines of a sex slave...erm...riding buddy.

Yeah, yeah, thats it ...compliant riding buddy... :angel:

 

[user 6393]

You also have to consider the model she has to work with.

:wub:

 

[El Gordo]

The reality is that since you ride your already at the front of the line with this bunch.
Phil

A woman that likes going in bike shops & tool stores, rides her own motorcycle AND points out any large ******* that I might have missed is definitely a keeper! :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo:

 

[madmike2]

No, when it comes to the 'push right buttons for desired affect' thing, I was thinking more along the lines of a sex slave...erm...riding buddy. Yeah, yeah, thats it ...compliant riding buddy... :angel:

Oohhhhh.... Er... Uhm... :huh: Oh my...

[SIZE=8pt]Imagination on overload....must think...how to ask who is compliant vs. dominant "riding" buddy...nope, don't go there....arrrgh, I need a cigarette and I haven't smoked for 28 years...and I don't drink...brain cells are in mass confusion...OMG...virtual memory overload. ...Warning...Warning![/SIZE]

:dribble: :dribble: :dribble: :dribble:

 

[user 6393]

No, when it comes to the 'push right buttons for desired affect' thing, I was thinking more along the lines of a sex slave...erm...riding buddy. Yeah, yeah, thats it ...compliant riding buddy... :angel:

Oohhhhh.... Er... Uhm... :huh: Oh my...

[SIZE=8pt]Imagination on overload....must think...how to ask who is compliant vs. dominant "riding" buddy...nope, don't go there....arrrgh, I need a cigarette and I haven't smoked for 28 years...and I don't drink...brain cells are in mass confusion...OMG...virtual memory overload. ...Warning...Warning![/SIZE]

:dribble: :dribble: :dribble: :dribble:

Geez Mike, I apologize. Didn't mean to send you off in a tizzy... :blink:

Lets see...apparently I am a 'keeper', yet I don't get my way. As I am quite happy and content with it all, I think the math on this is pretty easy as to whom the dominant is in my relationship and to whom the submissive is.

:yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: