BikerGeek99
Yeah, it's a concrete corn cob. So?
There is no global warming.
Chuck Norris was cold so he turned up the sun.
Chuck Norris was cold so he turned up the sun.
Happy 70th Birthday Chuck Norris!!
- Thread starter BikerGeek99
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BwanaDik
Well-known member
OK BG, you started it (and it's not even Friday)
01 Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
02 Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
03 Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
04 If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
05 Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
06 When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
07 Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
08 Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
09 They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take **** from anybody.
01 Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
02 Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
03 Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
04 If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
05 Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
06 When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
07 Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
08 Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
09 They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take **** from anybody.
wheatonFJR
...
:lol: :lol: :lol:
squeezer
Squirrelly Geezer
Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
bikesniffer
Well-known member
Chuck doesn't eat honey, he's chewing bees 
Alfredo
Alfredo
beemerdons
Certifiable Old Fart
Chuck Norris once ate an entire ream of rice paper and shat out origami swans and Mister Miyagi from Karate Kid.
Papa Chuy
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a ******* Indian.
Papa Chuy
Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.
Papa Chuy
Papa Chuy
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a ******* Indian.
Papa Chuy
Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.
Papa Chuy
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Mizz Bustanut
Well-known member
Ok, here's a few . . .
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through dry land.
Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.
When you open a can of whoop-***, Chuck Norris jumps out.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through dry land.
Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.
When you open a can of whoop-***, Chuck Norris jumps out.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
FJRay
Well-known member
It wil be nice when this thread dies.
Bustanut joker
Well-known member
Chuck Norris is Beemerdons *****..
:jester:
:jester:
FJRay
Well-known member
And another one slides into the **** pile of forum humor. :clapping: :clapping:
Bustanut joker
Well-known member
An deservedly so Ray.. What is it with ol chuck that makes him so popular?
Foonzie would'a beat his *** down!
:jester:
Foonzie would'a beat his *** down!
:jester:
squeezer
Squirrelly Geezer
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris can run so fast he can punch himself in the back of the head.
Under Chuck Norris' beard, there isn't a chin. It's just another fist.
Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He pushes the world down.
There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
Chuck Norris can run so fast he can punch himself in the back of the head.
Under Chuck Norris' beard, there isn't a chin. It's just another fist.
Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He pushes the world down.
There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
James Burleigh
Well-known member
Gunny that, Bust. I first came across Chuck Norris when he was running a bunch of karate studios across SoCal in the 60s. I've never liked his movies. First of all, the guy's ugly; he needs to lose the beard. And his movies hit the wrong balance between serious and cartoon action. They're worse than Stalone and his Rambo franchise. Too cartoonish for me. And of course the "acting" is, well, "acting." For me he's right up there with Adam Sandler and Merle Streep: celebrities I love to hate. Hey, Chuck: :****:
squeezer
Squirrelly Geezer
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
When Chuck Norris jumps into a river he doesn't get wet, the river gets Chuck Norris.
Whether a fan of Chuck or not these are just plain funny... if you have a sense of humor. :lol:
Whether a fan of Chuck or not these are just plain funny... if you have a sense of humor. :lol:
FJR-RemingtonRider
Their Sunset / My Sunrise
There are no such things as lesbians. Just women who haven't met Chuck Norris.
And JB. Chuck Norris says your movies suck more.
And JB. Chuck Norris says your movies suck more.
Last edited by a moderator:
RenoJohn
Well-known member
But there are gay men, -those who don't like Chuck Norris.
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