Happy 70th Birthday Chuck Norris!!

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Not Chuck Norris Fans

A few excerpts:

Chuck Norris sits down to pee.

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He passes out after two wine coolers.

Before the boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet to make sure Chuck Norris folded all the clothes correctly.

I once saw Chuck Norris get his candy stolen by a baby.

If you shaved off Chuck Norris's beard, you see that he's actually composed of two small crying girls.

 
And another one slides into the **** pile of forum humor. :clapping: :clapping:
Chuck Norris once commented to FJRay: "There are few problems in this world that cannot be solved by a swift roundhouse kick to the face. In fact, there are none."
That's why he has a beard. He didn't duck fast enough. :yahoo:

 
It wil be nice when this thread dies. :rolleyes:
When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion, one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ***, smokes a cigarette with FJRay, and then round house kicks them in the face.
Damn! That makes you one bad hombre Don.. I mean if he's your ***** you must be doubly bad..

Twice in the *** though? That's just nasty..

:jester:

 
It wil be nice when this thread dies. :rolleyes:
When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion, one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ***, smokes a cigarette with FJRay, and then round house kicks them in the face.
After that one Don, I may need to buy you lunch. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:


When Chuck Norris jumps into a river he doesn't get wet, the river gets Chuck Norris.Whether a fan of Chuck or not these are just plain funny... if you have a sense of humor. :lol:
These are definitely funny. But does it have to be Chuck Norris? How about Billy Barty? :)
Sorry Hans, Billy Barty just doesn't do it. But I feel a some Billy B jokes coming on.... :p :lol: ;)
When earth quakes are under Billy Barty's feet, tsunamis are created. See that's kind of lame. :p

 
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Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

^My all time favorite.

 
chicknorris.jpg
 
Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris did in fact, build Rome in a day.

The war with Japan would have ended sooner, but the allies decided that dropping Chuck Norris on Hiroshima would be a crime against humanity.

Space is continuously expanding because other galaxies are running away from Chuck Norris.

The keyboard on Chuck Norris' computer doesn't have a question mark, he only has answers.

 
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