Holiday Fruitcake Recipe

Tyler · Dec 16, 2008

Holiday Fruitcake Recipe

1 C Water

1 C Sugar

4 Large eggs

3 C dried fruit

1 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp. salt

1 C Brown sugar

Lemon juice, nuts

1 FULL bottle of your favorite whiskey

Sample the whiskey to check for quality.

Take out a large bowl.

Check the whiskey again to be sure that it is of the highest quality.

Pour 1 level cup and drink. Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1 C of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add 1 tsp. sugar and beat again.

Make sure the whiskey is still OK.

Cry another cup. Turn off the mixer.

Break two geggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Mix on the burner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaters,

pry it loose with a screwdriver.

Sample the whiskey to check for toxisisticity.

Next, sift 2 cups of salt.

Or something. Who cares? Check the whiskey.

Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one tablespoon of sugar or something...whatever you can find.

Grease the oven. Turn on the cake tin to 350 degrees.

Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window.

Check the whiskey again. Go to bed.

Who the hell likes fruit cake anyway???

vroompuppy · Dec 16, 2008

To say I'm not a fan of fruitcake would be a serious understatement, but this is a recipe I'm sure I could come to love. :good:

Thanks Tyler, I'm still gigglin'.....

VP

Tyler · Dec 17, 2008

vroompuppy said:
To say I'm not a fan of fruitcake would be a serious understatement, but this is a recipe I'm sure I could come to love. :good: Thanks Tyler, I'm still gigglin'.....

VP

Yeah, it's funny... I just don't seem to be able to get the recipe right... so I have to try it over and over and over again...