My son, Danny

[Niehart]

My 13 year old son passed away 27 years ago today, November 3rd. Still causes pain in my life and governs a lot of things that I do and say.

My oldest daughter was his best friend and also still is my best friend. She sent a card with this message inside.

"Grief is a most peculiar thing, were so helpless in the face of it.

Its like a window that will simply open of its own accord.

The room grows cold and we can do nothing but shiver.

BUT, it opens a little less each time and a little less and one day we wonder what has become of it?"

I'm not to the point of wondering what has become of it but I'm to the point of not letting it control my life.

My saving grace was having two beautiful, intelligent, thoughtful daughters that made life worth living.

Hug your kids and let them know that they are loved.

Neihart

PS: Axeman, your in my prayers every day.

 

[Beamer Reamer]

Sometimes it is easy to lose sight of the really important things, so I will take your advice and give my three boys a hug first thing tomorrow. Thanks for the reminder and I wish you the best throughout the day.

 

[Steve01]

Really puts life into perspective, with loosing two daughters 8 years ago the pain is still felt, the memories are still there. I shall always make sure my three boys get a big hug and the support they need and try to put my daily strive behind me.

Thank you for sharing the card message from your daughter.............

 

[wheatonFJR]

My sincere condolences to anyone who has lost children...

...I cannot imagine the pain.

I hope that as time goes by, that the painful memories shrink and the good memories grow of the time you spent together.

 

[Warchild]

My sincere condolences to anyone who has lost children...
...I cannot imagine the pain.

Nor can I. If I lost any of my eight children, I would be fearful of falling into an abyss of grief so deep, I dunno what the outcome would be....

So I *do* think about you all who have gone through this immense pain, and believe me, I hug those 8 children of mine every chance I get....

 

[Fred W]

"Grief is a most peculiar thing, we're so helpless in the face of it.Its like a window that will simply open of its own accord.

The room grows cold and we can do nothing but shiver.

BUT, it opens a little less each time, and a little less, and one day we wonder what has become of it?"

That is quite beautiful.

Your daughter is lucky to be able to express herself so fully with her words.

It's healthy and healing to be able to do so, in some form.

Conversely, it is unhealthy to keep it bottled up inside.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts...

 

[dcarver]

I am totally clueless as to how this would feel.

I have no children.

I do, however, read teh grief and pain, and hope too, in your words.

May you heal my friend.

 

[Greg E.]

The loss of loved ones is a pain that we never quell. I lost an unborn child in 1992 and have yet to totally get over it. Such a surprise, the intensity. I cannot fathom how deep the pain of losing a child of 13 years must be. You are in my thoughts today.

-GSE-

 

[mdisher]

My sincere condolences to anyone who has lost children...
...I cannot imagine the pain.

Nor can I. If I lost any of my eight children, I would be fearful of falling into an abyss of grief so deep, I dunno what the outcome would be....

So I *do* think about you all who have gone through this immense pain, and believe me, I hug those 8 children of mine every chance I get....

Ditto, I have 5, and while there have been times I'd wanted to make that (4 or less)...

I can't imagine the pain/grief that would come with losing one of them.

-MD

 

[Panman]

Hey wing man, I can't imagine what it's like. I have lost a good friend to alchool because he lost his little boy. Sorry man!

When the Axeman lost his son I showed my boy his post's about his son, Jesse got a long hug that night.

Call anytime man you got my number.

 

[TheAxeman]

That was really beautiful and so true.

The thing I fear the most is losing my memories of Jordan. Sometimes, no matter how hard I try to remember aspects of his childhood I can't and it really bothers me. The last time he ever phoned home to me from Iraq was on my cell phone and of course it went to my voicemail because there was no cell service. He said he was sorry that he had missed me, that he was leaving the wire and that he would talk to me in a couple of days. Of course that day will never come. Even though I transfered his message to my computer it was tragic the day that his voice was permanently removed from the mailbox, another piece of him gone. Its little things like that that most people never think about. Its things that only a parent who has lost a child can know. I'm sorry for your loss Niehart and I'll make sure to say a prayer for your son today when I visit mine......

 

[Tyler]

I cannot even fathom losing a child and am so sorry for your loss. But that you remember him, share him, keep his light alive, he continues on. Grief is a part of life and, with time, will lessen but never really go away... and I don't think that's a bad thing because it keeps us remembering those we have lost. I send prayers to you and all who have shared their losses here for peace in your heart and spirit.

 

[happyPuppy]

My heart goes out to you. I can only imagine the pain, it sounds like you are a great dad, be proud of yourself, you have earned it. I am sure your son would say the same too. Thanks for sharing your story.

 

[Auburn]

G - As others have already said, I cannot begin to imagine what your family has gone through. Thank you for sharing. You have a very insightful daughter.