NWS Rectum Stretcher

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fossilrider

Well-known member
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Jul 5, 2006
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Location
Richmond Hill, ON
While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10 miles over the limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?

"To which she replied, "I'm late for work."

"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"

"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.

The cop stammered, "A what?

A rectum stretcher?

And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"

"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide."

"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot ********?" he asked

"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge...”

Ticket ------------------$95.00

Court Costs ------------$45.00

Look on cops face ---Priceless

 
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I dare you to try that one... Hey Pig, I would bet there would be probable cause for a search and seizure after that one... Whattaya think? :lol:

 
Hey Pig, I would bet there would be probable cause for a search and seizure after that one... Whattaya think? :lol:
I'm embarrased to admit that I even opened this thread after seeing the title and NWS warning... :puke:

I don't know about search and seizure on that one, but at a minimum, it's contempt of cop.

 
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Is that like the girl who said, after he got both hands in, "Now Clap!"

And when he said, "I can't...", she said, "Pretty tight, huh?"

B)

 
And me looking at payin Uncle Sam several thousand next monday thought taxes would have to be the rectum stretcher. Oh, wait, this hole is only six feet :(

 
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