SigepKat,
I'll warn you straight up: based on what you asked us here, you probably don't want to read this. So be forewarned, I'm going to step out on a limb here. When it comes to stuff like this, I'm kind-of the black sheep of this FJR family.
This forum will no doubt provide you with plenty of feedback about how you can "get out" of this. They can and will give you plenty of ways to justify that riding and smoking are not the same thing. Granted, they're not. However, I don't see it that way, and it seems that your wife doesn't either. I"m guessing your wife knows how much you love to ride. We all know the feeling, as we do too. It's time for the two of you to sit down, shut off the tv, the cell phones, the computer (and THIS forum): lock the door, and have a genuine heart to heart.
YOU HAVE A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY HERE.
It may never come along again. Sometimes life doesn't give us a second chance to make the right decision. Based on what you've told us, your wife already knows you don't want to make this decision. Thus far your answer seems to have been, "Let's just wait awhile." Maybe you can, and maybe it'll be OK, and she's lighten up. Maybe she won't. But I'll leave that to the others on the forum to bat around. They've already done a pretty good job it seems, as at the moment, your post is only 4 hours old.
We vowed, "till death do us part." However, both of you are looking at something that very well may cause your death. We would certainly agree with you, and most of her friends, no doubt would agree with her. Granted, smoking and riding a motorcycle are not the same animal, but I digress. She was suddenly reminded that you're well being is more important to her than anything in her life. Certainly you feel the same about her. You know what smoking will do to her. You may have asked yourself many times in the past, what more can I do, what more can I say? I'd give ANYTHING to be able to convince her to quit. Well, here's your chance my friend.
This is your big chance, and perhaps the greatest opportunity that could ever be handed to you. You've got something in your hand that you can use to convince her to quit. You've got something that can convince her to actually accomplish this. I think you know where I'm going with this.
LET'S MAKE A DEAL
Tell her that you'll give up riding for her if she'll give up smoking for you. It's just that simple. Maybe it's not fair, maybe it's not necessary, maybe there's another way, maybe, maybe, maybe. Who knows? Who will ever know? But this one thing I do know. There's no way you can make a statement like that without conveying the fact that your wife and her health are more important to you than ANYTHING in this world.
And maybe, just maybe, it will be enough to make her say, "I'll do it... if you'll give up riding, I'll quit smoking." And with a little luck, she just might make it. And when you're a really old fart, and sitting on a porch somewhere holding her hand, you'll be able to look back to May of 2013 and thank God that you jumped on a golden opportunity when you did, because your sweetheart accomplished something that she NEVER thought she could do because of your sacrifice for her. If it works, it most likely will extend her life and improve her health. It may even save yours. But it will definitely send a clear message of just how much she means to you.
To keep this from becoming too long, I'll not tell you the rest of my story, but I did something very similar to this many years ago for a loved one, and have NEVER regretted it.
Gary
darksider #44
