YooperDick
Well-known member
A tourist is walking along a wharf and sees an old man sitting on a crate. He decides to strike up a conversation.
Tourist: Gee, you look like an old sailor to me.
Sailor: Aye, that I be. Sailed the high seas fer farty nine yahrs.
Tourist: That must have been an exciting career. But, not to pry, is that a wooden leg you have there?
Sailor: Aye, that it be. We wuz roundin' the Cape o' Good Hope in high seas when a wave come along and warshed me overbard. Befar me maties could pull me from the warter, a shark swum by and bit me leg right off at the knee. That leg thar was carved from a spar o' that good ship.
Tourist: Incredible! But is that a hook I see on the end of your arm?
Sailor: Aye, that it be. We wuz droppin' anker off Mada-gas-sker back in '38 when I got me hand caught in the windlass. Took it right off. That hook thar was farged from a nail me maties pulled from the hull o' that good ship.
Tourist: Unbelievable! One more thing; I see you have a patch over your eye.
Sailor: Aye, that it be. I wuz up on the yardarm mendin' sail when me looked up, and a gull flyin' over pooped right in me eye.
Tourist: Hey, c'mon. You can't loose an eye from something like that.
Sailor: Aye yer can, when its the day after yer lost yer hand in the windlass.
Tourist: Gee, you look like an old sailor to me.
Sailor: Aye, that I be. Sailed the high seas fer farty nine yahrs.
Tourist: That must have been an exciting career. But, not to pry, is that a wooden leg you have there?
Sailor: Aye, that it be. We wuz roundin' the Cape o' Good Hope in high seas when a wave come along and warshed me overbard. Befar me maties could pull me from the warter, a shark swum by and bit me leg right off at the knee. That leg thar was carved from a spar o' that good ship.
Tourist: Incredible! But is that a hook I see on the end of your arm?
Sailor: Aye, that it be. We wuz droppin' anker off Mada-gas-sker back in '38 when I got me hand caught in the windlass. Took it right off. That hook thar was farged from a nail me maties pulled from the hull o' that good ship.
Tourist: Unbelievable! One more thing; I see you have a patch over your eye.
Sailor: Aye, that it be. I wuz up on the yardarm mendin' sail when me looked up, and a gull flyin' over pooped right in me eye.
Tourist: Hey, c'mon. You can't loose an eye from something like that.
Sailor: Aye yer can, when its the day after yer lost yer hand in the windlass.
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