California Commuter Chronicles

[James Burleigh]

Threading up toward the Caldecott Tunnel this morning on Highway 24, I was in the second lane from the right (actually the third, since at far right is a long on- and off-ramp). Suddenly the two cars in front of me start braking and swerving. I have two fingers covering the brake and apply it while trying to take in everything 360 degrees around me, wondering just how ugly it's going to get in front of me.

Then I see the cause: a #%&*! wild turkey has wandered onto the freeway. It's now in the middle of my lane and heading left toward the no. 1 lane just as casually as if it were walking down the lane to church.

I figure I'll go right over the top of the sumbitch if I have to, but I'm more concerned about how the two cars ahead of me are going to react, given their density relative to the bird's, not to mention the 100 thousand tons of steal heading relentlessly toward me under the control of people texting, talking on the phone, eating a bagel, talking to the dog on their lap, typing an email on the computer on the seat next to them....

But before I can decide my path, the cars are past Mr. Jakelips the Turkey safely, who suddenly does an about face, and marches off to my right, leaving me free to proceed straight.

My adrenalin is through the roof as a result of the 5-second incident, and my mind is racing. Remembering the dead deer I'd seen a few days earlier up against the median divide near that the same stretch of freeway, I shake my head and think...

Well, what would you think?

DD

 

[johnny80s]

Love the avatar Hans.

 

[Spud]

Last year on my way home from WFO I was cruising along at about 80 in a big right hand sweeper in the middle of nowhere montana and suddenly a huge black turkey just steps right onto the road from out of nowhere. Given my lean angle, I swear my right hand just brushed right past his head. The bird didn't seem to care but it scared the living hell out of me. Those things look big when they get in front of you!

Here's a pic of some more I took last year north of Spokane, WA--lots of them crossing the road up there.

 

[SacramentoMike]

". . . I shake my head and think...
Well, what would you think?"

I sure know what I'd be thinking . . .

 

[Khunajawdge]

It's amazing how when a jolt of adrenalin is released in the system that the taste of copper fills the mouth. The turkey picture above looks like copper to me! I "think" that a turkey like this should(?) be the image on a penny, not on a quarter.

 

[James Burleigh]

". . . I shake my head and think...
Well, what would you think?"

I sure know what I'd be thinking . . .

Now that's some funny chit.

It's amazing how when a jolt of adrenalin is released in the system that the taste of copper fills the mouth. The turkey picture above looks like copper to me! I "think" that a turkey like this should(?) be the image on a penny, not on a quarter.

:blink:

Here's a pic of some more I took last year north of Spokane, WA--lots of them crossing the road up there.

Yep, that's what the little ******* looked like.

 

[FJRBluesman]

Hans - No one was picking their nose while shaving?

 

[Tree Doc]

That's some potentially serious fowl! The last Tom I shot weighed in at 25#. Definitely NOT something I would want to hit on two wheels.

My neighbor's Dad visits here a lot from East Bay. He's a retired CHP Officer and rode a motor for many years. His beat was the Oakland area and that entire stretch of 24 and the Caldecot tunnels. He told me that was the absolute worst place for wild critter strikes. He lost count of the number of times that he was nearly taken out by Deer and responded to countless accidents involving the 4 legged forest maggots.

Glad you missed the turkey!

 

[gregory]

I'm thinking peanut oil at about 350 degrees..........

 

[ShinyPartsUp]

Hans,

I just ate some turkey sausage in your honor.

 

[painman]

I think it just fit in with the rest of the out of control turkey's on that streach of road every morning. Excluding you of course Hans.....PM. <><

 

[James Burleigh]

I think it just fit in with the rest of the out of control turkey's on that streach of road every morning. Excluding you of course Hans.....PM. <><

:clapping:

 

[RsvlFeej]

I figure I'll go right over the top of the sumbitch if I have to
DD

Bad idea - Fookers can fly (and are probably heavy enough to skin you right off your bike)

Semi-related story - I obliterated an owl I'd guess weighed about 10# - Hit him going about 60 mph with my right knee - Hip joint and knee ached for 3 days afterward. Wouldn't care to find out how much more damage something 250% heavier would cause...

 

[Checkswrecks]

But was the turkey on his cellphone?

[ ta-dump ] B)

Got hit in the shoulder by a turkey vulture's wing once, coupla sparrows, and a bat one night. A sparrow squarely hitting your helmet at highway speed is about like getting hit with a billy club and something to be avoided. Hitting a real turkey would generally suck.

 

[James Burleigh]

Thanks, guys. Got it: Don't hit the turkey.