Little Johnny

[Tyler]

The teacher asked the class to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence....Molly put up her hand and said, 'My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.'

The teacher said, 'That was good, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate', not 'fascinating'.

Sally raised her hand. She said, 'My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.' The teacher said, 'Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate'.

Little Johnny raised his hand.The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word, 'fascinate', so she called on him for his offering. Johnny said, 'My Aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight.'

The teacher sat down and cried.

 

[7xray]

Well, that would fascinate me too

 

[johnny80s]

Why is it always Little Johnny? Doesn't Bob, Bill or Doug ever get in trouble.

 

[Tyler]

Why is it always Little Johnny? Doesn't Bob, Bill or Doug ever get in trouble.

I dunno... why don't you tell us?

 

[FJRBluesman]

Why is it always Little Johnny? Doesn't Bob, Bill or Doug ever get in trouble.

Tired of people telling of your blunders....

 

[kaitsdad]

I think Aunt Gina needs a larger sweater. With a zipper.

 

[FarWestFastEddie]

Tylerbabe, WoW hot new pic :clapping:

and good joke, but you forgot Little Johnny's

first name, it Nasty, like in Nasty Little Johnny

Keep up the great smile!

FWFE

 

[v65]

What's Aunt Gina's address again?

 

[FJRONAMISSION]

MMMMMMmmmmmmM....... thanks for the mamories..... did Johnny

mention if it was a bit nippy ???

B

 

[user 6393]

....just sitting here thinking...

Have never met anyone named John/Johnny/Jonathan who ever behaved. BRATS, all of them!

hmmmm, intellesting

 

[johnny80s]

....just sitting here thinking...
Have never met anyone named John/Johnny/Jonathan who ever behaved. BRATS, all of them!

hmmmm, intellesting

Hey now...

 

[FJR DaveH]

Groan.... but what can you expect from Little Johnny?

 

[FuzzyRider]

....just sitting here thinking...
Have never met anyone named John/Johnny/Jonathan who ever behaved. BRATS, all of them!

hmmmm, intellesting

Hey now...

Here here - there are plenty of us named John/Johnny/Jonathan that are decent and respectable...well, at least I think there are.

 

[sonicspeed]

hmmmm all this talk about johnny makes me want to go to the john and maybe check my johnson

 

[Scoops]

Teacher asks the class a math word problem: "if there are 3 vultures sitting on a fence and you shoot one, how many are left?"

Little Johnny (exsqueeze me) "Nasty" Little Johnny raises his hand insistently.

Teacher thinks, "nothing he can do this question," so allows him to answer.

"None! cuz the other two flew away when they heard me shoot!" Johnny proudly answers.

Teacher smiles to herself and, looking for a way to encourage his good behavior, replies, "No Johnny, there would be two left . . . but i like the way you think."

Johnny frowns at the teacher and says, "Three women are sitting on a bench eating ice cream cones. One is delicately nibbling the top, one is licking the sides all around, and the last one is taking the entire thing into her mouth, vigorously licking the sides, and sucking the bottom. Which one is married?"

Exasperated and caught off guard the teacher sputters, "Well, i imagine the last one."

"Nope," says Johnny, "The one with a wedding ring . . . BUT I LIKE THE WAY YOU THINK!" :haha:

(Johnny is identified Gifted). :grin: :blum:

 

[user 6393]

(Johnny is identified Gifted). :grin: :blum:

...as is woman #3 :blum:

 

[rushes]

Where's the "This thread is worthless without pictures" emoticon?

I'm a visual kinda guy....

 

[Brodie]

Better?

 

[Bearly Flying]

Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.

The man at the counter asked the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"

"Eight," Nasty Little Johnny replied.

The man continued, "do you know what these are used for?"

Little Johnny replied, "not exactly, but they aren't for me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's four. We saw on TV that if you use these you would be able to swim and ride a bike. Right now, he can't do either."