On a serious note:
I don't think there is anything wrong with your bike or the tire, Iris. I have always worn out PR2 rears on the sides before the center, but not nearly as fast as 5000 miles. The reason for the side wear is that I usually shun the slab and take the back roads as much as possible. That hard center compound never has a chance to wear down unless you do a lot of miles in a straight line.
The PR2 rear that I put on new for our 2-up cross country ride, even though it was nicely scuffed to the edges in the Rockies, still wore into a square shape overall, and it was only 1/2 worn out after 6500 miles (and is still on the bike now). That is what happens when you ride in a straight line on the highway for the majority of those miles.
I would guess, from your tire wear rate and wear pattern, that on your week at EOM you stayed off the highways, and probably had some spirited twisty road corner exits under heavy throttle as well. Your new 2014 has traction control, which means you can goose it pretty good coming out of a corner with little fear of a back end slide out,
but... the tire does actually have to slip somewhat in order to engage the Traction Control. Were you, by any chance, testing the limits of that new traction control feature?
Right hand corners are sharper on average because we drive on the right side of the road, so you would also be more apt to slip the tire and engage the TC on a right hander.
Another thing that I have noticed about our new third gens is that when in "Sport Mode" the throttle is considerably more abrupt than the old '05's were. The quicker throttle may induce more wheel slip than what you had experienced in the past on your '05.
The throttle is also considerably slower acting when in touring mode. I notice that a lot because it makes a throttle rocker almost useless since you have to turn the throttle grip so far at cruising speeds, but the touring mode does make it much easier to ride smoothly. Were you, perhaps, riding in Sport Mode most of the time, and maybe Jim was riding in Touring mode? Or maybe Jim is just easier on the throttle coming out of corners?