Rider down

[Silver Penguin]

After 6000 blissful miles in just two months on the new bike, the party is over. According to the Officer at the scene, the bike was 'Vaporized' rather than just totaled.

A rear ender between two cars in the fast lane spilled one of them into the HOV lane at 90 degrees, about 20 feet in front of the bike. At 65mph, the bike was able to stop on impact but the rider carried on moving a further 25 feet, over the median onto the other side.

FF helmet and leathers saved the injuries being a lot worse but what he got will side line him for quite some time. He has five fractures, two in one leg, two in one arm and one in the other arm. He's also got a compression fracture of his thoracic spine.

I'm still in disbelieving shock over this and I think he is too. Haven't ridden my bike since it happened and am getting more nervous by the hour. If this could happen to a strong, experienced capable rider like him...... He is my rock, my mentor, my riding coach as well as my dear husband of 26yrs.

He's not going to take well to being in need of total care. That's not his style at all. Any advice from the male point of view on how to help him through this? I'm a nurse, so I can do all the stuff no problem but how does an independent guy handle it?

Jill

 

[Ari Rankum]

After 6000 blissful miles in just two months on the new bike, the party is over. According to the Officer at the scene, the bike was 'Vaporized' rather than just totaled.
A rear ender between two cars in the fast lane spilled one of them into the HOV lane at 90 degrees, about 20 feet in front of the bike. At 65mph, the bike was able to stop on impact but the rider carried on moving a further 25 feet, over the median onto the other side.

FF helmet and leathers saved the injuries being a lot worse but what he got will side line him for quite some time. He has five fractures, two in one leg, two in one arm and one in the other arm. He's also got a compression fracture of his thoracic spine.

I'm still in disbelieving shock over this and I think he is too. Haven't ridden my bike since it happened and am getting more nervous by the hour. If this could happen to a strong, experienced capable rider like him...... He is my rock, my mentor, my riding coach as well as my dear husband of 26yrs.

He's not going to take well to being in need of total care. That's not his style at all. Any advice from the male point of view on how to help him through this? I'm a nurse, so I can do all the stuff no problem but how does an independent guy handle it?

Jill

That's really awful news, to be sure. My heart goes out to you both.

Mighty considerate of you to try to ease his frustration at being helpless while he heals. I think you'll find, especially if he's in a lot of pain, that he'll be willing to swallow his pride a bit and be grateful for the help. Oh yeah...occasionally he'll be really, really ornery.

I hope all goes as smoothly as possible for you and DH as he recovers. Take care.

 

[trinibob]

our hearts go out to you both tell DH we are all thinking of him!

 

[Bearly Flying]

Sorry to hear about DH's accident. Best wishes for both of you. Don

 

[TheAxeman]

Really sorry to hear about your husband's accident. I think the hardest part for him will be initially accepting the fact that he can't just get up and do what he wants and will have to rely on others. As days go by though, he will adjust and accept the spot he's in and his life will slowly become easier again. The bones will heal, the pain will subside and he will eventually be up and about doing everything he used to. I'm sure psychologically he is hurting as much as he is physically and talking about it will definitely help. Get him laptop and tell him to join us. If the whackjobs on here can't cheer him up, nothing will. Very lucky for him to have a caring, understanding, knowledgeable partner to help him through. I wish both of you a smooth ride through this difficult time.

Chris

 

[teerex51]

Jill,

That's really bad news. Your husband has a long recovery process in front of him and both of you guys need lots of strength and patience.

As for the accident itself, there clearly wasn't anything more he could have done to avoid the impact.

Had he been a less experienced rider the accident would have probably been fatal.

I guess I have no advice to offer from the male point of view. I am recovering from a (not as serious) accident myself, in which my wife, too, got hurt. I'm now walking again, mostly without a limp, and I haven't been riding my bike since March 26th.

Walking again was the target I focused on and organizing the bike's repairs also helped a lot. I spent hours in the garage taking the bike apart and putting together a shopping list of new parts I needed.

I guess looking forward -- and not back-- was the key.

My wife, Chris, and I wish your husband all the best and a prompt recovery.

Stef

 

[ronjrieth]

SP,

So sorry to hear about the mishap. Thankfully he made it through. Hard to say how he will react... play it by hear and call on the rest of us for any type of support you may think he needs...God Bless,

Ron

 

[KSFJR]

Thank God for riding gear. Its sad to hear of your event but good to hear that it was not worse.

Best wishes for a full and speedy recovery.

Chester

 

[sixfootfive]

Jill-

I am so sorry to hear about the DH's accident. Thank god he had all the gear on. :blink: As far as your own nerves, we all know the risks involved and dressing for the crash lessens that some. Initial shock will set anyone back in their thinking about riding but I believe with some time you will be OK. As for taking care of him, your right, it won't be easy as us men seem to not take to that so well. Being a nurse though ( and a Pedi one as I recall) I am sure that you have had your share of difficult patients and will whip him into shape in no time.

Take Care

 

[Geezer]

Sorry to hear this. Things happen so fast. I'm sure you know this, but get him back into shape as quickly as possible. Sounds like he's the type who won't take well to being babied, so don't baby him.

Don't let this incident keep you off your bike. If you are nervous about getting out there then schedule a ride for yourself at a time when there is little traffic and find out that you still enjoy riding.

 

[Toecutter]

Sorry to hear this news. It's always disturbing when one of us is collected up in someone else's mishap. But that's the risk that comes with the reward of the freedom we enjoy.

I'm really good at letting others take care of me, but I think it comes naturally, so DH probably has a painful adjustment period ahead. Maybe try keeping him supplied with books and show interest in his reading progress, it might distract him a bit.

Maybe he'll sign on here and start shopping for an FJR?

 

[jjsC6]

I have to go along with "Axwman's" resonse. Other than that I'll just say best wishes to both of you for a speedy recovery. I'm the same type of person as you have described him. All I know is that people learn to adapt to what they have. You can't look back and wonder why - can't change it now. All you can change is how you deal with it now that it has happened. The best healer is simply time.

 

[vinnie]

Jill,

At this point, feeble as it may sound, all I can say is I'm really sorry this has happened.

I have heard it said that most professional football players, whenever one of their team mates is hurt (especially a serious injury) walk away and turn their heads. Suposedly because they do not want to be reminded of how fragile their bodies CAN be in the field.

this past year, all of us riders in this forum have kinda been forced by the misfortunes of others, to look into the abyss a few times.

It scares the hell out of me.

The pain, discomfort, time and money that it's going to cost for DH to get back on his feet is nothing compared to the psychological wall he's gonna have to jump at the end of the journey he's in. Thank God you are a nurse and probably have experience in dealing with people with these kinds of injury. I hope all of us can somehow help you and your husband climb over that last wall when the time comes.

Wish there was more I could do to help you.

Vinnie

 

[GreyGoose]

As you know from being a nurse. Its all about time. Keep that positive energy flowing, try to keep him comfortable. He knows your there for him, so let the healing process take its course.

Wish there was more we could do.

If you have any physical therapy related questions concerning his injuries, I have the background and would love to help.

Sincerely,

GreyGoose

 

[Leghorn]

Very sorry to hear this news. Try to stay positive and upbeat. And while the long-term goal is obviously complete physical and mental recovery, set some intermediate recovery goals that can mark progress. I agree on the laptop--hook him into a supportive discussion forum, such as this one--and let him rant away. And, not least, be patient. This puts a lot on your plate, too--be sure to take care of yourself.

One other thing for both of you, if you have a friend and/or know a professional who is a good/non-judgmental listener, they can be a great resource in terms of letting each of you mentally process the trauma by talking it out.

Good luck to you both!

 

[shokdimn]

Jill,

Sorry about the tragedy. Know that another fellow-rider is thinking of you both and hoping that your husband has complete recovery.

 

[SoCalFJR]

Jill,

I am sorry to hear about your husband's accident. My father was hit last summer while riding his HD and I know how traumatic it can be, both for the injured and the family and friends of the injured.

I don't think there is any broad sweeping or general advice on how to help your husband's recovery. Time will tell how is going to deal with the process. Your immediate questions regarding how to handle the situation prove that you are sensitive to his needs and appear willing to do what it takes to help him through and that's awesome. I'm sure you will do a great job.

I will pray for you and your husband. Keep us posted and don't hesitate to ask if you need anything.

Mike

James 5:14-16

 

[kaitsdad]

SP, I just don't know what to say. I'm sorry this happened.

DH has a long, rough road ahead of him (as do you) and I wish he and you all the best.

The laptop idea is huge. Get him wired up and on this forum and I can pretty much guarantee that his mind won't be focused on the accident.

DH, heal up and get back in the saddle.

Get Well Soon.

 

[TejasFJR]

SP,

So sorry to hear about the accident. I think Stefano has a good point about looking forward and not back. I've had some tough times lately and it was thinking about everything that was still ahead of me that made it easier. Good luck with everything and prayers for both of you.