The Great White North Liberation Army Invasion Report

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Two Mexicans, a Polak and a Razer go out into the desert...

Already this does not sound like it is going to end well. The morning was very cold when we got up with the temperature right at freezing. If I wanted this kind of weather I could have stayed home. At first I was going to blow off this ride and sit in the RV park's hot tub all day. In the end I did not want HotRodZilla and Patch comparing me unfavorably to Big-D so I suited up and off the three of us went out into the desert as Tucson Joe and his wife followed us out to the staging area.

By the time we got unloaded and sorted out it was close to 11:00 but it still was not all that warm yet. The plan was to ride to the start of 10 Mile Wash Trail and follow it towards the Colorado River since this trail was wide enough for Joe's side by side ATV. Here I am leading Joe into the first of a few wet spots along the way....

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Here is Zilla doing what he and I would be doing for a good part of the day....

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While I was leading one of the many sand snakes reared it's ugly head...

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and sent me over the edge and landing in a bush in the bottom of a small gully....

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Fortunately I had the foresight to street hire some cheap Mexican labour in the form of Zilla and his brother Patch to pick up my bike for me allowing me to save some energy so that I may fall off again.

Patch has taken his brother Zilla out in the trails to teach him how to ride dirt but every now and again when Zilla is messing up Patch has to give Zilla a reboot where it will do some good....

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Joe was like a little kid. You just could not keep him out of the puddles....

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Our fearless leader, Patch came to this one water crossing and we just wanted to be sure exactly how deep it was before taking the plunge....

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If you notice you can go around the end of the water but were dealing with Mexicans here and they were doing a fine job of picking me and my bike off the ground every now and again so I wasn't going to argue with them.

Here is Zilla still splashing mud all over Joe's poor DRZ Suzuki....

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I managed to get tangled up with another sand snake and I was nackered at this point and told the rest of the gang to press on while I had a rest. There was only another mile or so to go until they were going to reach a water crossing that was too deep for Joe's ATV and we were going to have to go back anyways so I grabbed the opportunity to take a break....

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Again having the cheap Mexican labour was very helpful.

Here is why the ATV was going no further. The drop off the rock was too much and the water was too deep....

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Somewhere along the way back Zilla had to stop to expose himself....

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and proceed to pull cactus needles out of his butt but I had not seen any cactus in the area and no one else had seen any either. His poor brother had to come to the rescue and yank the needles out. Zilla was yelping like a little girl so at least Patch had that to enjoy.

Once again Zilla had to stop to take another sand sample...

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Near the end of the return trip up 10 Mile Wash while I was leading (which for some reason is 30 miles long) I finally found something I could bang my bars against like the trees back home....

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While these are not trees it was the closest thing to one I was going to find in Utah.

All the above photos were supplied by Joe's wife Cec from the passager side of the Razer ATV. Many thanks for leading them to me for my ride report.

- to be continued-

 
The videos you shared at dinner were well done and in HD. Are you planning on posting any of those Bill?
I am trying to upload them but the bandwidth may be too high for the hotel internet. They may have to wait until I get home but I will be posting them ASAP.

 
Don't do it Bill. He just wants everyone to know that Alex and I fell down and went bang.

As far as that second day, we picked up the bikes a LOT, but we had a Hella good time.

What a blast that was!!

 
I thought we all fall down and on occasion, decide it's in our better interest Not to ride a certain trail or climb a certain hill. There is no shame in anything that involves Forum members.

When showing my daughters forum pics, all they ever comment is "you guys look like a bunch of old fat nerds and geeks". I just don't understand why those girls can't see the fun FJR riders have!

 
After we got back to the staging area I was all set to load up the bikes but AJ & Alex found a berm that made a nice jump and they talked me into a photo shoot. Here is Patch (Alex) on the KTM getting a nice launch and catching some air....

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We got back to the park in time for a quick dip in the hot tub before heading over to the final dinner with the entire group at the Moab Microbrewery.
The Great White North Liberation Army made an announcement that we were going to return Moab to the Yanks. While there were some pretty rocks the sand was getting into our underwear and making us irritable. Also as an occupying force we would have to regulate Patch and HotRoadZilla and that was more aggravation then it was worth. In the end we let everyone off with a firm scolding and the next morning we started our strategic withdraw along the same path as our initial attack.
Many thanks to BeemerDons for taking care of the arrangements as the rallymaster for FODS and to all the other folks even though some have the bad taste to bring a GS BMW to Moab. That is like bringing a pea shooter to a nuclear war.
Also very special thanks personally to AJ & Alex. It was a complete blast to ride with you guys. We had lots of laughs along the way and especially thanks for getting me back upright on the numerous occasions when I didn't have it rubber side down. Many thanks.

 
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Great reporting and pics guys and girls! Too bad the weather was so cold but the dirt/sand looked great. I'm officially jealous I couldn't be there but glad everyone had a good time. If there are more pics hiding out there somewhere I'd love to see 'em.
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You Canadians might think it's a clever ruse to be out frolicking in plain sight to divert attention from Canadian spies but know this - we remain vigilant.

 
Bill

Great report. You stated it just like Cec and I saw it.

Good job.

AJ the bike takes a licking and keeps on ticking.

Good thing it was sand.

Joe

 
Tom & Pam were thinking of heading over to Bryce Canyon but on second thought decided that whole area needed a second invasion and decided to head over into that area on a later trip. Given what we were hearing about the I70 conditions around Vail we decided on a southern retreat from Moab. Just south of Moab is Wilson's Arch. Pam had been couped up in the cage for most of the trip and it was time to let her out, wind her up and see where she would go....

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That's her waving back at me after she dragged Tom up the hill. I was still too stiff from three days of riding rock & sand for my first ride of the season and was not going to venture any further than I could crawl back to the truck.

The next day we stopped for an early lunch next door to the American Quarter Horse Museum in Amarillo, TX. Do you folks remember that rather infamous photo of Tom and the rooster? Unfortunately that particular affliction appears to run in the family...

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and this time Pam can't blame it on the tequila. I did not have the heart to tell her you ride the horse not the poor little calf.

Enough of that. Here is the video that Patch & Zilla were willing to pay good money (well not that good, it was going to be in pesos) for you folks not to see....



We are currently staged at the home of Homer & Marge Simpson in Springfield, Missouri and are planning our assault on Owosso. The plan is the re-patriate the Tim Horton's in town and deprive those upstart Yanks of decent coffee.

 
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Excellent Ride Report! Just wish I could have been there to see all the soil sampling 'live' in person.

 
**** we fell down lot. Its really too bad that the steepness of those inclines gets lost by the camera...

Dayum that crap was fun.

 
You dofus.. I reported this to the assembled Generals at Timmy's this morning..
Armed with your spot link and knowledge of troop size, rest assured they will be more than prepared for the assault.

After studying the above video I suspect part of the defensive will involve sand...

 
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