All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth

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ponyfool

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Sing with me now, "All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth, my two front teeth, my two front teeth!"

I just got home from the hospital (after 18 frikkin' hours). Summary of injuries: Four front teeth pushed back, right front got completely knocked out. Broken facial bone (the one behind my mustache, whatever the hell that's called). Dislocated tip of left ring finger with a small fracture. Lots of bumps and bruises. The MRI came back negative on anything serious in my back, including the L4/L5 stuff I had surgery on last year. Teeth are all back in place close to where they were before they got redecorated, but it'll be two to four weeks before they'll know if they'll hold. The front left tooth that didn't get knocked all the way out is cracked at the base of the root, so it's not likely to survive. Pictures will be at the bottom of the post. You thought I was ugly before...just wait!! :)

Here's what happened, and no, it's not glamorous.

One of my officers did a traffic stop. He approached the driver's window and heard the guy revving the engine. The officer asked the guy to turn off the car, and the guy took off. I was only seven blocks away because I had just come from the same call that my officer had come from before doing this stop.

The guy turns south on SE 79th Ave from Division Street (mostly residential at around midnight thirty on Monday morning), and the officer is about a block or two behind him because he had to run back to his car. I go south on 82nd Ave (major street) and parallel the pursuit. I also announce on the radio that I am supervising it. When the guy pops out on Powell Blvd, I am at Powell/82nd, so I turn west to assist him. The guy turns west on to Powell, then south on to 74th Ave. Thus far, even though he is eluding, he isn't driving crazy. Slowing for stop signs, etc. I get behind them on 74th Ave and give my officer the authorization to use PIT (the "make them spin out" maneuver) when we have enough cars to cover the stop and it's clear. We cross Holgate and officers have already blocked east and west to prevent an accident. With those guys now in the pursuit, we have enough to cover the stop. I tell my officer to take out the badguy when we get to Foster.

SE 74th is a narrow street when cars are on both sides. Just before Foster, street parking is prohibited, so my officer moves up and does a beautiful PIT. This is the first time I've even seen a PIT that I didn't do outside of training, and he did it well. We are trained that once you have done the PIT, you accelerate out of the area to safety to avoid a cross fire once the car is stopped. The car spins and I can see the stunned look of the driver as he is frantically trying to get the car started again. I quickly pull up and put my PIT bumper up against his bumper, thus ending the pursuit.

He jumps out of the car and starts to run, so I start to chase him. I am feeling really good. I am gaining on him, and I am elated at the fact that this not so thin 40 year old (me) was likely going to catch this son of a gun. I am closing the gap quickly now, and I start to spread my arms to do a bear hug tackle the way we used to always do things. But just as I am starting to close in on him to initiate the tackle, I remember, we don't do it that way anymore, we merely push them and they fall down, kinda like cow tipping. So, I push him, and sure enough, in full stride, he starts to go down.

He goes down, and I remember thinking, "That's gonna leave a mark." Just as that thought comes in and goes out, his foot bounces and touches mine ever so slightly. Now I am off balance and am still in a full stride. I can see that I am going to fall, so I put my left hand out to brace, but didn't have time to react fast enough and I ended up face planting the curb. It is a pretty sharp curb with maybe the radius of a quarter, and I hit the corner of that curb with my face right below my nose. Just then, the time distortion kicks in, and everything slows down. I mean really slow. I have only experienced this on three other occasions, both of my shootings and a car accident where I was the passenger and I actually watched the air bag unfurl and I could read the serial number or markings on the air bag. This time though, I watched as my front right tooth gets ejected from my mouth and start to tumble away. I could see that it was completely intact, and I actually started to reach for it before I had my second impact after bouncing. That's when I knew I was hurt. I never blacked out, but the smell, taste and feel of blood all over my face and running down my neck and in my throat was immediate.

I tried to get up to go arrest the guy, but when I tried to stand, I fell back down and had no stability causing me to fear my back was FUBAR. The officer that did the PIT came running up, and right by me to the suspect. He and several other officers took him into custody, and then one of our medically trained guys came up and tended to me. I kept trying to roll over to look for my teeth (it felt like I had multiple teeth missing because of how far back the others were bent into my mouth). I kept saying, "Find my teef, find my teef!" One of the officers thought I was saying "piece" as if I had dropped my gun and another officer thought I was saying something else (not sure what, he told me, but I was on drugs and don't remember now what he thought I was saying.

I was transported to the hospital by ambulance while someone put my tooth in a small container of milk. At the ER, a specialty dentist (myoflaxi something or another), a guy that started off as a dentist, then became an MD, then became a surgeon, is called in. He numbs me up, starts pulling and pushing on my teeth, puts in the knocked out one, and then secures them with a piece of wire that is glued to the entire top section of my teeth for stability. He then puts 14 stitches on the inside of my upper lip. Another doc came in and yanked on my finger to reset it (didn't hurt believe it or not), and that seems to be doing pretty well too! They put my through a CT Scan, and then schedule me for an MRI some twelve hours later at 2pm (the earliest time available). I was required to remain locked down at the neck and back this entire time. That was incredibly uncomfortable. They had me on morphine for two doses, but it didn't do anything for me so they switched to something that started with phynel.... and that worked really well.

At about 6am, they told me that if I didn't pee, I'd have to get a catheter. Well, at 10am, some 10 hours after the injury, I still hadn't peed, and I still didn't have a catheter. I was feeling tremendous pressure in my stomach, so they put in the catheter, and in less than 5 minutes, I had more than a liter and a half evacuated!

At 2pm, I got the MRI, and then waited until 4:30pm before they finished their analysis and told me I could be un-mummified. That was the break I was looking for. Once they took those braces off, and I was able to move a bit, I started feeling significantly better. My upper lip is bigger than my nose, but it just doesn't hurt that much when on the medication.

I did some sleeping, but not much. I had a bunch of visitors from the assistant chief, my commander, a couple of my fellow sergeants and a bunch of officers. The chief called me to say she was sorry she couldn't come, but wished me well. It was very nice getting that kind of support. On one of the get well cards I got, a fellow sergeant wrote, "Scott, Scott, Scott. Sergeants stay in their cars, officers chase...." I thought that was funny.

And now for the pictures: NO LONGER ON SERVER, SORRY

 
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ok i can't look. blood. teeth. i'm out. ewww...getting faint.

so glad your not in a worse state Scott!

 
Clumsy oaf! Learn to run and keep your balance! :angry2:

Holy crap, Scott, that sound like zero fun, all of it! The teeth... broken phalanges... and perhaps worse of all... the catheter!!! :blink: :blink: :blink:

Guess we should rule out getting you a basket of fresh Washington apples for Xmas, huh? :D

GLAD YOUR BASICALLY OKAY, 'BRO!!!!!!!!!

 
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Dayem!

Glad to hear your are relatively ok, and you got the bad guy. Guess it's a good thing you never decided to be a ballerina. Don't think you would have been too successful as one. :lol:

Hope the healing goes as well as it can.

 
Glad you lived to tell about it! Heel well and fast. Kudos to you and your boy for getting the job done.

 
Pony,

No clever remarks, sorry. Just a sincere get well soon.

As we go through the process of recovering from the big windstorm here in the Northwest, I'm reminded that I'm grateful for guys who, like you, are on the job.

You may want to stick with your fellow sergeant's advice for a while. He sounds like a wise fellow. :)

Cheers,

Jim

 
Get well soon, Scott. Never did think your job sounded like much fun. Too many morons, and worse, to deal with. Glad your sense of humor wasn't injured, but it's especially good news that your back isn't as bad as first feared.

 
Get well soon. Have you asked if the department will cover the cost of plastic surgery? You could use the chance to end up looking like Brad Pitt.

 
Dang Scott, that looks painful. Hope you're able to heal well and quickly... and always remember that curbs are the devils spawn.. just waiting to smack you around... never trust the curb... ;)

 
I guess you should have been wearing your MC helmet... remember ATGATT.

True story... a former Sheriff in Franklin County Ohio actually made his road deputies wear crash helmets in their patrol vehicles in the 80's.

Get Well Soon

 
Ponyfool - while you were being stitched back together, did your brethren ask the Bad Guy why he elected to run?

Unpaid parking tickets?

Driving license suspended?

Or some other worthwhile reason to put you and the public safety in jeopardy? :angry2:

 
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Get well soon. Have you asked if the department will cover the cost of plastic surgery? You could use the chance to end up looking like Brad Pitt.
Or you could end up looking like Joan Rivers. Don't push your luck and get well soon. By the way, riding motorcycles improves balance and coordination....

 
Just like in the PIT maneuver, you should hit and run fast out of fire. :D Better yet, next time just carry a brick. I hear it does job better and at the safer distance. :D

Glad you are relatively well.

could never figure out why people run from COPS.

 
Scott, repeat after me:

"I will NOT suck on curbs, I will NOT suck on curbs" ....

Hey - I'm glad you're not more seriously injured. Heal fast, and get back to it.

And a big Thanks for doing what you do. When my daughter heads out to school each day, I thank God that there's guys like you out there protecting her. Kudos.

Kaitsdad

 
Glad to see hear you post up! Those pictures made me hurt! OUCH!

I had to laugh at the part where you were saying "Find my teef!" LOL Sorry, Could not help it!

Enjoy the wonders of fine medicine! :)

Adam

 
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