A Parking Lot Lecture At Wally World

[Silver Penguin]

This thread has gone terribly off track.... :huh: Reminds me of when we were having our kids long ago and it seemed like other women always had to tell the expecting mom about the baby that was born with its brain outside its body or some weird thing. Still working on an appropriate come-back.

You wanna talk about f'd up babies? I'm a professional. I'm part of a team that keeps these critturs alive, with the generous help of Joe Taxpayer. I've seen the inspiration for Star Trek and other science fiction characters. I haven't seen everything, but I can gross out most folks pretty easily.

Jill

PS No political statement is implied here. I'm aware that this is an FJR forum. A connection may be made that these infants will never grow up to experience the joy of riding an FJR.

 

[FJRMGM]

"Alright....... "Death by Shitting"!

That would make for a pretty sweet Death Certificate.... "

Actually, it's a real medical cause of death and is called "Death while straining at stool".

It's what Elvis died of.. Really.

 

[Bob Hughes]

What about those folks that keel over during their morning dump? After lying down all night, they sit on the pot and bear down. The vagal response slows an already weakened heart, more than it can tolerate. Heart stops. Dead guy falls over.

Alright....... "Death by Shitting"!

That would make for a pretty sweet Death Certificate.... :lol:

I bet that there are forum members who have not gone to the john in 3 days... just in case, me I'll take my chances.

 

[Zorlac]

I guess there's something to be said for diarrhea.

 

[uctofeej]

What about those folks that keel over during their morning dump? After lying down all night, they sit on the pot and bear down. The vagal response slows an already weakened heart, more than it can tolerate. Heart stops. Dead guy falls over.

Alright....... "Death by Shitting"!

That would make for a pretty sweet Death Certificate.... :lol:

I bet that there are forum members who have not gone to the john in 3 days... just in case, me I'll take my chances.

Wasn't there an X-Files episode along these lines? Some dude died on the crapper. Whats-his-name thought it was alien activity, but Scully said he over-strained and popped an aneurysm. (Shoulda eaten more fiber, I guess)

But I digress from the topic at hand...

 

[TheAxeman]

I'm still trying to figure out how my original post turned into a discussion about keeling over while taking a dump....You guys are good :blink:

 

[Rogue]

What about those folks that keel over during their morning dump? After lying down all night, they sit on the pot and bear down. The vagal response slows an already weakened heart, more than it can tolerate. Heart stops. Dead guy falls over.

Alright....... "Death by Shitting"!

That would make for a pretty sweet Death Certificate.... :lol:

I bet that there are forum members who have not gone to the john in 3 days... just in case, me I'll take my chances.

Not me, you can't be too safe!

 

[Firedog]

True Fire Medic Story:

A man passes out on the toilet--probably from vagelling out--and falls forward. His face gets planted on the top of a trash can with a plastic liner and suffocates to death. All because he passed out.

When it's your time....it's your time!

I'm going to keep riding my FJR.

 

[Silver Penguin]

"Alright....... "Death by Shitting"!
That would make for a pretty sweet Death Certificate.... "

Actually, it's a real medical cause of death and is called "Death while straining at stool".

It's what Elvis died of.. Really.

Here's the official word, from a funeral director that I spoke with this morning. A death certificate usually has one primary cause of death, with other contributory factors listed beneath. In this case it would probably read:

1. Myocardial Infarction (or Cerebrovascular accident)

2. Arteriosclerotic cardiovascular disease

3. Hypertension

Possiby related to bowel obstruction. The word 'constipation' does actually appear on death certificates now and again, although not usually as the primary cause of death.

Jill